Thursday, February 4, 2010

Sentimental Thoughts Third

Assalamualaikum Hanafiah, how’s life? Em, it’s kinda boring rite now, at night, with no internet, no tv, well, looks like I’ve gotta make use with all the time that I had to the greatest use possible. But this practical timing really helped me a lot, at least my mind is occupied thus it took off some unwanted sour memories, and I’m so damn busy rite now, no time to be sentimental. But still, despite the loudness of the ATR and Dash-7 or the APU, I still find myself empty, and hollow with this sudden rush of loneliness overflowing into every vein in my body, like blood only accompanied by some high decibels mixture of humming engine sound. Well, no wonder they said ‘someone STOLE my heart’ ;-)

How is she? How are u girl? How’s life? Are u feeling better today? What did u do today? How was ur day? Did anybody tried to hit on you? Haha, I guess such questions are obsolete rite now, and its kinda perplexing that I cud never ask such questions again, well, it looks like the theory of turning into strangers doesn’t only apply to u girl, but as much I want to resist such thing to occur, I’m affected as well, but lets hope it wont stay forever.

Girl, there’re so much things that I wanna say, directly, but it seems the chance is running slim, and here I am writing this piece of my mind, I don’t know how long will I recover from this incident, if I could see this coming, I would’ve tried even better, but then again, it’s already too late.

Well, I don’t know why, but I cant seem to distant myself from you, I cant even bother to hate you despite all the things that u said, yup, u’re rite, and I’m to blame totally, but still…I don’t know, I just wished I had done something, but I cant seem to find any, thus in the end, u had made a very wise decision, no, u’ve just dodge the greatest bullet in your life. I am after all no good to you, we just didn’t suit each other, and that’s the truth, and u know what they said about the truth kan?

I can only say this, despite how stranger we will become, how distant the relationship between us, lets remember this, I will always thought you as my best friend, my first ever, the first female ever to help me come to where I am today, and as much as I want to stay on longer with you, some greatest lesson in life must be taught alone, and here I am. Thanks girl, for one of the my greatest lesson too in life, came from you, even tho it was kinda painful, and sour memory, but it really educated me, and that’s the only objective I can achieve rite now. Em, if u somehow u find urself in a big trouble, money, or maybe just need a hint on guy’s perspective, not that my weird perspective wud help u a lot, but still, I’d be very glad to assist you. I may not be one of your top ten internet friends, or no longer will be able to send u some fancy gifts, or leisurely send u sms to ask if we’re going to hit any theater on the weekends, but hei, I’ll always be there when you need me. Tell me where and I’ll come rushing. I may not be able to love you endearingly like a lover, but I would gladly love you as a friend.

One of the few things that I picked up during running is perseverance, and it was never in my slightest intention to give up, but right now, I’m just slowing down my pace, and choose another route, and hopefully with God’s grace I will find the finishing line to every moments in my life, and my moments with u had gone just like the wind that blows onto my face, it was refreshing, very awakening, and with it I’m able to continue breathing, and now I’m back on my feet again, just like I always had, but dont worry, the cool breeze will blow its way again. Thanks girl, thank you so much :-)

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