Back then, after SPM, i dont know what you guys will call it later, but mine was dat, and it never occurred to me to ever further my studies here. Ever since I failed my SPM miserably, the only thing dat came in my mind is what, or where I am going to further my studies, without having to put real burden on my mum, and the man question dat came next is how? The second question is the hardest to find, to solve, because with my qualifications, and grades, I pretty much sure there are not any place available for me.
I tried applying for matriculation course, swearing that if i got the same chance again I will not screw it up, because back then, it was the cheapest method I can get, and life was not easy back then as lots of things happened. I was really worried, ur wan (orang negri panggil wan) was worried as well. Deep down I realized that I had screw things up, it was my fault, for taking the chances that I get for granted, and here I am suffering the consequences. But it looks like fate had not allow me to take the path and I didnt get the chance for matriculation.
So, with screwed up mind in my head, I came across an advertisement on the paper; it was about study exhibition, MARA study expo. I hesitated, but thinking maybe I might as well check it out; who knows what fate had in its store for me. So, with few of my friends, and uncle Shauki, I went there, we check things out. And I came across UniKL for the first time, and heard about its matriculation, or foundation course, which they refer as Foundation in Engineering Technology and its located in Kolej MARA Kulim, Kedah. I applied, and the following week I received the reply, and I got it. I brought it up to ur wan and things are all good again.
And now, after a year graduating from UniKL Malaysian Institute of Aviation Technology, I was pretty much jobless, I went to few training like INSEP, and TeSSDE program, and I managed to work in Kemuncak Pesaka with your uncle Sufian for two months and a half I guess. Thinking back of the experience that I go through, the huge number of interviews which I rarely succeed, and the ups and down in the past few years, not to mention that searching for ur mum can be quite a pain in the ass, I cant be more thankful, I cant be.
Before I make the decision to come here, I often ask myself why is it relevant for me to fork out lotsa money, and put on huge effort in furthering my studies. I often ask myself too, why is that I wanna study this subject? And the answer came in slowly, and i kinda grasp the idea late, as usual, haha.
I know that, by having this degree, I can find better employment, in much better company. And with the knowledge I gain here, I will bring it back, hoping that somehow, some way, my knowledge can be used for the betterment of the life of my countrymen, and I have no intention of failing no matter how weak my knowledge is.
Before I came here, I was actually in a rush, and I dont had much time telling most of my friends. Well, I am quite a quiet person anyway, and as soon I attained the visa from VHF, I purchased the flying ticket on Friday evening, after coming back from MARA, and my mother had this small gathering between families on Saturday and I went off on Sunday.
There are lots, lots of people supporting me, and I admit, there are time, often that I doubt myself. I was never the same guy before, and after SPM, and that stigma had definitely taken its toll on me, on my confidence and how bring myself in public and society, but as the experience accumulates, I started to walk out of the shell, slowly but surely, and I admit, the view is pretty much different out here, out of the small, limited confined shell.
Before I came here, there are lots of people that had supported me, friends and family. And as I came here, I met lotsa new people too, and new friends. The best thing about being minority in a big, vast country, we Malaysians tend to look out for each other, and like I always had people looking out for me not only in Glasgow, but in Malaysia as well, and I thanked God for blessing my journey, fate had made me meet all these wonderful people, and letting them be part of my life.
Masa ayah sampai, I had few things, beberapa persoalan that came into my mind, but I think I'll save it for some other times. For my friends who are going to having their convocation this time around of the year, I would like to take time to convey my congratulations to you guys, and this will be one of my motivations in performing better in studies too. For my beloved friends and family, thanks for supporting me, I cant thank you guys enough. You guys are my giants, and I will always love you guys, like I always had.