Saturday, November 26, 2011

Salam Maal Hijrah

Assalamualaikum kids? Em, Im kinda speechless today, but nevertheless, it wont stop me from saying things. Today is Maal Hijrah, a new year in the Islamic calendar. It's a fresh start all over again. Talking about fresh start, I was among the fortunate ones, to be given the opportunity to press the hypothetical 'restart' button in my life, and all the f**ked up things that I did, I was given the chance to redo and redo and redo it all over again.

But my question is, why, on what logic basis for us human to continue making the same mistake all over again when we know such thing is hazardous, endangering and threatening to ourselves? What kind of mental model do we adapt for us to adapt such way? Does the world capitalism lead to these bad things; these negativity bottled up in one rotting soul? is it the overpopulation? is it the question of faith? is it the question of phase and period? or perhaps could this be just an illusion to make things complicated? what gives? I too dont seem to find the real answer behind it.

Recently, i had a discussion, with people we had dialogues but i was pretty much keeping things to myself, i was scared, i was afraid to speak up, i was overly conscious, and having practice giving presentations in classes and training still cant help me overcome my public anxiety. I kept things quiet until the end. I was the less productive, the most non contributing person in the class, however until the end, i tried summing up all the things they said.

All the things that happened in this world, is because of us, it is because of ourselves; we choose to walk on the route to wherever we're going today, and by God's grace, we're reaching there; and if the world is overpopulated, if the world is becoming congested, if the world had suddenly fall upon us, IT ALL HAPPENS BECAUSE WE CHOOSE TO BE IN THAT WAY, and there's no way winging it. We are what we are today because we choose to be that way, and why procrastinate? If we dont like what we are today, so step up and make the right decision that will befit your soul and soothes your heart, but let me tell you this; those things that we thought are the best things for us could end up being the other way around, and vice versa.

We never know about the future, but know this; sesungguhnya setiap yang baik itu datangnya dari Allah s.w.t. dan setiap yang buruk itu datangnya dari kelemahan dan kekurangan diri kita sendiri. I cant say much kids, u know the decisions you're going to take, and i hope you guys will be wise enough in making decisions for those are the traits that i dont have and i've always sought after. Love your life kids, if you're thinking you're making the wrong turn in life, u can always go backtrack. And if you're lost, there's always the Quran and Hadith to guide you back on the right track. I will love you guys, like I always had :-)

Thursday, November 24, 2011

Five Minutes Song Duration of Writing (Maher Zain - The Chosen One)

Assalamualaikum kids? How's life? Haha, today, i met with this lovely, beautiful kid and her parents are faithful Libyans. And of course, almost like emotional father, or maybe the sense of parenthood just started to kick in, or whatever the feeling im having at that time, I know i want to have it with you; and seeing how much I enjoy seeing the kid, I cant imagine how thrilled I am to see you guys, my beloved kids growing up.

maybe, you guys often wonder; "why the heck that this blogs is full of sum crap parenting advice?" or "what is he talking gibberish about? family? kids? damn it man! You're just 24 and u dont even have your own job yet, and you cant even take care of yourself and you want to have family" or perhaps "apa benda la mamat ni, ingat senang ke nak ada keluarga, nak ada tanggungjawab?"

As much as the answers are pretty much not on my side, and as much I want to have those capabilities, those traits of a father, I DON'T and that's fact. I just don't, at least for the near future, BUT that doesnt mean I am giving up; giving up my desires to have a family; giving up my desires to see you guys grow up, and become a better person in society, the desire to bear ALL these responsibility.

I believe, the most valuable essence, the basis, the strength to become a father, bearing such huge responsibility is to have the desire, to want to become one. I will continue to make effort, to get my message through, to have the burning passion and desire for my offspring, and I will continue doing so even when I am no longer breathing, even when I am only living in your heart and precious memories.

One of the key aspects in life is making decisions, that is derived by the desire to want to accomplish the things we think is the utmost valuable to us; and just remember that every options that we choose, has its consequences, and remember too for every fiery, burning desire that we decided to put off, will only make the surrounding darker, and before we're about to be swallowed, emblazoned in the pitch black, step up and make actions and the right decision to light it up again; who knows, the future that once may seem so dark is now brightly lid!

We never know the things that are gonna strike us, and things, happened, unexpectedly. However, we could make effort, and pray for the best. If God's willing, I will meet you one day kid, and let's hope I dont forget the feelings I had today. I will always, will always love you, like I always had :-)

Monday, November 21, 2011

Five Minutes Song Duration of Writing (Maher Zain - Freedom)

Assalamualaikum kids, how's life? For Freedom? I dont know what to say tho, there are so many things you can say about freedom, but there are just times when ironic speaks, and you dont really know about things or important matters that u once tot u know it so much, so briefly.

'Freedom' , is one those powerful words that walk side to side with 'integrity', 'passion' , 'faith' and other things any one could think of. The people of Malaysia, had been fighting so hard, and they had sacrificed so many things regardless of they realizing it or not, sacrifices in terms of direct or indirect, knowing or unknowingly they had offer things that they believe will contribute to the betterment of this country, to the things they believe in, to to things that they have 'faith' on, those things that keeps on their 'drive' and 'passion' burning; all these things they believe in only reflects deeply on how their true colors are, their inner-self, their 'integrity'.

Freedom had definitely plays an important role in our life, being free and being able to do the things that we wanted is what we thought we sought but let's face it, only by obeying God's rule can we become truly free. I am definitely not one of those people who have the ability to preach or teach others, but I would like to think that I am when I was once alive, I had created posts or write things that inspire people to change and find their true freedom.

Being muslim, our definition of freedom can be somewhat perplexing for the atheis, for people who of different creeds and beliefs; they often ask how can by preventing to do so many things, how can by putting up so many restrictions and had to obey lotsa rules in islam can one be considered free?  That's one of the question I often ask, but dont worry, my faith is not shaken, but only to be very determined to show how freedom really is, at least from my perspective as muslim.

God had definitely have His way in guiding us, without we realizing it or not, but often we did not, and I too am one of those unfortunate ones. At times, I was never thankful for the things that I had, never realized what a precious gem I've been holding on, only to realize the worth of it once it's already gone. I believe, Islam put up such restrictions as guidelines; and us, the humble servant of God tends to screw up and make mistakes in life, thus Allah knows what is best for us.

I cant be more preachy than today, for sum reason, I just cant; for my knowledge is superbly inadequate, and the knowledge I accumulated until today cant even be compared to the tiny droplets of water in the ocean. Kids, grow up to be a better person in life, and remember, love your parents too, cause I love you guys, like I always had.

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Five Minutes Song Duration of Writing (Westlife - I Had a Dream)

Assalamualaikum kids? How's life? Haha, from now on I wanna start to introduce sumthing random, yeah, im gonna try to write anything dat comes up to my fickle minded mind as I hear to random, favorite songs in my music playlist. So, anything dat comes up is pretty much random after all, based on the songs that I listened.

Okay, so here goes....I have a dream, of making the world a better place for us to live in, maybe I cant contribute much to society yet, and as much as I want to, there are just excuses and procrastination dat comes up, created regardless of my intention tho.

I know this may be naive, like "what the heck mate?" or "why? are the world we currently live in is not good enough for you?" those negative perspective definitely stir up, but still, it's of course is much easier to just succumb and dive into negative ideas, stay relax and do nothing at home, but I am not one of those people, I hope, i tried to remind myself, that I want to contribute, I want to make people happy, I enjoy a win-win situation and i hate seeing tears of pain and bloodshed especially in my home country, I hate the fact that people starts to segregate themselves into different political parties, opinions and thoughts make them so divided, they focus on their differences rather the things that they had in common, or just realize that each one is trying to survive just as well, just trying to live, and should we realize too that without them, we dont exist. we should acknowledge the fact that their existence complements our lives, our short, fragile life that is such a waste to spend it on being angry and pissed off all the time.

I love people, i love friends, I may not look like a friendly people, but I realized that too, apart from family, these strangers who I met along the way, along the route, sepanjang perjuangan ini, these people who fight shoulder to shoulder with me, these people who helped me in achieving to become a better person, a better man, a better muslim in life, these people, i endearingly hold onto, these people who I called friends, I cant convey how thankful I am, and only be able to express it, soliloquizing it to myself that after family and blood relationship, u guys are the most valuable thing I sought after. And as life goes on, people will change, they wont stay by yourside any longer, and good friends depart but good friends arrive as well, or so they said.

Time's up, I need to go now kids. Ciao! Assalamualaikum, and I will always love you guys like I always had :-)))