Assalamualaikum kids? How's life? Haha, today, i met with this lovely, beautiful kid and her parents are faithful Libyans. And of course, almost like emotional father, or maybe the sense of parenthood just started to kick in, or whatever the feeling im having at that time, I know i want to have it with you; and seeing how much I enjoy seeing the kid, I cant imagine how thrilled I am to see you guys, my beloved kids growing up.
maybe, you guys often wonder; "why the heck that this blogs is full of sum crap parenting advice?" or "what is he talking gibberish about? family? kids? damn it man! You're just 24 and u dont even have your own job yet, and you cant even take care of yourself and you want to have family" or perhaps "apa benda la mamat ni, ingat senang ke nak ada keluarga, nak ada tanggungjawab?"
As much as the answers are pretty much not on my side, and as much I want to have those capabilities, those traits of a father, I DON'T and that's fact. I just don't, at least for the near future, BUT that doesnt mean I am giving up; giving up my desires to have a family; giving up my desires to see you guys grow up, and become a better person in society, the desire to bear ALL these responsibility.
I believe, the most valuable essence, the basis, the strength to become a father, bearing such huge responsibility is to have the desire, to want to become one. I will continue to make effort, to get my message through, to have the burning passion and desire for my offspring, and I will continue doing so even when I am no longer breathing, even when I am only living in your heart and precious memories.
One of the key aspects in life is making decisions, that is derived by the desire to want to accomplish the things we think is the utmost valuable to us; and just remember that every options that we choose, has its consequences, and remember too for every fiery, burning desire that we decided to put off, will only make the surrounding darker, and before we're about to be swallowed, emblazoned in the pitch black, step up and make actions and the right decision to light it up again; who knows, the future that once may seem so dark is now brightly lid!
We never know the things that are gonna strike us, and things, happened, unexpectedly. However, we could make effort, and pray for the best. If God's willing, I will meet you one day kid, and let's hope I dont forget the feelings I had today. I will always, will always love you, like I always had :-)
