tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25699948139352001572024-03-13T14:51:44.919-07:00Like You Always Had100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.comBlogger105125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-50531495398657157542015-01-09T15:04:00.000-08:002015-01-09T15:04:12.900-08:00SuperfisialHampir setahun sudah berlalu.<br />
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Aku masih ingat dengan jelas bagaimana rasanya meninggalkan bumi itu; bumi di mana aku disentuh tarbiyyah;<br />
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Aku masih ingat dengan sangat jelas bagaimana tatkala pesawat MH1 mendarat di landasan KLIA, dan pada pengakhiran pengembaraan yang sangat bermakna itu kapten mengucapkan<br />
"<i>to all Malaysians abroad, WELCOME HOME</i>"<br />
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Aku masih ingat dengan sangat jelas bagaimana aku mengharungi kegelapan bumi Glasgow, menyelusuri antara liku-liku terpahit dalam hidup, suatu fasa kehidupan yang aku rasa sangat duka dan penuh hiba; tiada lagi seri senyuman dan ketawa yang mampu aku ukirkan;<br />
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Aku masih ingat dengan sangat jelas bagaimana rasanya ketika aku menjejakkan kaki pertama kali ke bumi Shamrock dan memerhatikan langit senja berwarna jingga yang aku fikir menandakan penamat kepada pengembaraan di bumi Braveheart dan merupakan suatu peluang dan rahmat dari Allah untuk memulakan pengembaraan baru. <br />
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Aku masih ingat dengan jelas bagaimana rasanya terkejar-kejar berlari atau melakukan kayuhan-kayuhan bermakna dan marabahaya (kononnya) menyelusuri setiap penjuru bandar Dublin, dan bagaimana rasanya untuk merasakan nadi dipenuhi dengan keinginan untuk menyemarakkan keIslaman dalam diri;<br />
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Dan bagaimana rasanya seolah-olah setiap nukleus meletuskan tenaga hebat yang suatu masa dahulu terpendam, memecahkan kembali sisa-sia jahiliyyah yang suatu masa dahulu mengundurkan minda yang peka, dan diri merasakan seolah-olah melakukan sesuatu yang paling bermakna dan penuh teruja.<br />
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Tapi kini aku rasa kehilangan arah kembali.<br />
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Aku rasa sangat sesat dan jauh;<br />
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Jauh dari landasan sebenar,<br />
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Kehidupan yang aku fikirkan seronok tidak bermakna;<br />
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Aku dapati mulai aku pasakkan diri dengan perkara-perkara superfisial. Dan mulai melalui lorong-lorong gelap dalam kehidupan.<br />
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Aku rasa sangat jauh; dan asing.<br />
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Tarbiyyah dan dakwah seolah-olah akronim yang sangat asing dan janggal;<br />
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Langkah yang suatu masa dahulu hebat,<br />
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Kayuhan yang penuh semangat itu kini tiada lagi.<br />
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Sinergi dakwah, dan tarbiyyah;<br />
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Mungkin itulah yang aku perlukan;<br />
Dengan harapan melahirkan nukleus-nukleus yang menjana semangat dan menatijahkan perbuatan-perbuatan yang dapat membebaskan manusia dari perhambaan dan kebergantungan kepada taghut kepada perhambaan kepada yang Maha Esa.<br />
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Sudah tiba masanya aku mencari kembali muntalaq yang telah hilang.<br />
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InsyaAllah. <br />
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<br />100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-57249824380760880572013-09-09T18:00:00.000-07:002013-09-10T18:45:27.419-07:00Walaupun Aku Anak Dol, Aku Juga Punyai Perasaan dan HaqAssalamualaikum kids. I know, at some point in my life I had stopped contributing towards this blog, however, I can assure you that I never stopped writing, at least not in my mind. Things happened, and I guess, now I am feeling prepared to write again, in a more constructive, assertive thoughts and sane mind, wallahu a'lam.<br /><br />Nevertheless, I guess at this point in life you may had realized a shift of paradigm in my writings, or maybe not, but I guess it is just another subtle way of saying "hanafiah, it is time to get out of the comfortable zone and get serious!". Well I guess here it goes: continuing the momentum where I left one year ago; hopefully with God's grace, He will be able to guide us throughout these hardships and difficult times along this journey we called 'life'.<br />
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I had a story I feel like sharing.<br />
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<i>Ayah ada cerita untuk disampaikan; yang ayah percaya, sedikit sebanyak mampu mencerahkan fikrah kamu.</i><br />
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<i>Dalam perjalanan ke tengah bandar Dublin di sebuah jalan bernama Aungier Street, ayah terserempak dengan dua orang budak perempuan kecil yang pada anggaran ayah berumur kurang dari 10 tahun. Dari jauh, ayah melihat mereka sedang menyepak-nyepak, dan menendang dengan sekuat hati sambil tersenyum ke arah pintu sebuah kedai. Kelibat mereka yang memakai baju merah jambu cerah tidak ubah lagak seperti anak dol (anak dol ialah anak-anak warga tempatan di Ireland yang hanya menerima wang kebajikan yang agak banyak sehingga tidak memerlukan mereka untuk bekerja dan selalunya berlagak samseng dengan memeras ugut orang lain). </i><br />
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<i>Dalam kelincahan kedua kanak-kanak itu cuba untuk menyepak dan memecahkan pintu tersebut, di sisi mereka ada seorang wanita asia, lagak seperti pemilik kedai tersebut. Namun, peliknya, raut wajahnya tidak pula menunjukkan seperti dia sedang dianiaya oleh kedua-kedua kanak tersebut; dan ayah pun terdetik dalam hati:</i><br />
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<i>"ni mesti kerja anak dol la ni, tak habis-habis nak menyusahkan orang; dah la banyak budak malaysia kena pau, dengan basikal aku curi, nak je aku rembat muka korang ni"<br /><br />tetapi, apabila ayah berjalan merentasi mereka, maka baru ayah memahami situasi sebenar. Mereka bukanlah cuba untuk melakukan vandalisme, atau sengaja hendak memecahkan pintu kedai tersebut, tetapi mereka sebenarnya cuba untuk menolong pekedai tersebut membuka pintu kerana beliau terkunci dari luar. </i><br />
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<i>dan ayah terdiam, terkaku sebentar. hilang setiap perasaan agresif, marah; malah diselubungi malu.</i><br />
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<i>"tahniah hanafiah, engkau secara rasminya telah berjaya menjadi seorang yang mementingkan diri sendiri; kau telah berjaya menjadi seorang yang tidak lagi menghiraukan kesukaran orang lain; di saat orang lain menghulurkan bantuan, kau hanya mampu berdiam diri"<br /><br />dan ayah terus berjalan dengan langkah yang berat.</i><br />
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<i>ayah terfikir, </i><br />
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<i>"jauh mendahului hak peribadi, adalah hak Allah"<br /><br />maka<br /><br />"bagaimana pula hak mereka terhadap Islam?"</i><br />
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<i>"bagaimana pula hak risalah Islam untuk disampaikan kepada mereka?"<br /><br />"takkan hanya kerana mereka itu kasar kita tidak dapat sampaikan ajaran ini kepada mereka?"<br /><br />"adakah Rasulullah s.a.w. terus menyerah apabila risalah Islam ditolak dengan cara yang lebih teruk dan kasar oleh masyarakat Quraisy?"<br /><br />"dan bolehkah aku berkata aku telah menyebarkan risalah apabila apa yang aku lakukan senang, kacang goreng sekali?"<br /><br />"dan apabila aku berdepan dengan sahabat-sahabat yang mungkin berlainan fikrah, berlainan pendapat; aku berasa kecewa kerana mereka tidak menerima apa yang aku sampaikan?"<br /><br />"dan seperti mana aku menghadapi anak-anak dol ini, aku juga mempunyai persepsi negatif yang mungkin terzahir dalam keadan sedar atau tidak sepanjang usaha mengajak rakan-rakan lain ke arah yang lebih Islami?"<br /></i><i>dan ayah telah membiarkan rasa prejudis, bias dan stigma dari pengalaman lalu mempengaruhi keputusan, emosi dan pemikiran; bukankah anak-anak dol ini juga berhak ke atas Islam seperti mana ayah telah mendapat kefahaman ini? seperti mana kamu juga mendapatinya? bukankah Islam itu rahmatan lil alamin? tetapi, mana mungkin ayah menjadi tamak dan menyimpannya untuk diri ayah sendiri tanpa dikongsi? tanpa diberi kepada orang lain? dan bagaimana pula dengan <b>SYAHADATUL HAQ</b> kita?</i><br />
<i><br /></i>(@_@)<br /><br /><i>Ayah kaku, dan terus berlalu bersama kesejukan tiupan angin musim luruh hemisfera utara.</i><br /><br />Wallahu a'lam.<br />
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I love you guys, like I always had :-)<br />
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<br />100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com8Aungier Street, Dublin, Co. Dublin City, Ireland53.339604599999987 -6.265854900000022153.337234599999988 -6.2708974000000222 53.341974599999986 -6.260812400000022tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-51698957486863140132012-03-28T17:41:00.000-07:002012-04-02T09:35:01.614-07:00Precious Glass is Already Shattered<div class="uiStreamMessage" data-ft="{"type":1}" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">
Assalamualaikum kids, how's life? It's been quite a while since I last updated my stories. I was yeah, the normal stuff, busy with things and juggling all the tasks together. So, recently, I saw one of my friends, mentioning that woman is like a glass.</div>
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<span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}"><span class="text_exposed_show">And I was like...speechless, again. No, please, from now onwards, there are many times I will be speechless, but you could never interpret it as something wrong or fishy; I just feel like keeping silent because this is the time that I believe is just to best shut up and speak ignorantly. But then again, I kept on writing, <i>tak tahu kenapa</i>.</span></span></div>
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<span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}"><span class="text_exposed_show">Woman are like glass. I...am sorry, but I could never seem to fully agree with this idea. People have different opinions, and ideas, while mine...just seems to be more selfish at times.</span></span></div>
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<span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}"><span class="text_exposed_show">If woman were to be as fragile as a glass, empty, easily scratched, easily broken, made lots of noise at the small expense, can be shaped and tempered at much lower temperature, can be find as easy as everywhere, no values whatsoever, only to be thrown out after it's already shattered because the idea of keeping a shard of glass with you seem ridiculously absurd because it could harm and injure you, not to mention that there are no esthetic value whatsoever to continue storing it, thus, at the end of the day, it will be placed where its rightfully belonged; the trash bin.</span></span></div>
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<span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}"><span class="text_exposed_show">I know, this is kinda harsh, but i am just stating fact, because saying that woman is like a glass in the first place is already getting on my nerves. </span></span></div>
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<span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}"><span class="text_exposed_show">I was brought up in a single parent family. I was a brat, a useless one indeed, My brother, well, let's just say he had his fair (fare?) share of troubling my mum. And she was busy, working from 9-5, she came back in the afternoon just to check up on grandpa, and me. She took care of my grandfather, she did it all together. She never ceased to amaze me. And woman, at the end of the day is just woman. A glass will always remain a glass, but mothers, wives, they are more than that. They fight. They harden. The true gem in the family. The ones that keep pushing the husband to move on forward when his feeling down, sacrificing her times for the sake of her family, she is strong; not easily shattered like the glass, and keeping her family safe is the utmost priority she bear in mind, far from getting hurt or turning her back on the family.</span></span></div>
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<span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}"><span class="text_exposed_show">Mothers, and wives, they are woman, but their values in life, their contribution transcends the any value money could offer, they are like...diamonds. They get tougher, each day, every single moments, every hardships that they continue to bear will only make them stronger, every test they had will only strengthen the bond among family members. In order for diamond to be created, one must go through excessive amount temperature, developed under extensive, high pressure deep down inside the core of the earth, and once it's fully matured, it will be the strongest material ever, that can be used to cut through anything. How's dat for a fine description of females? </span></span></div>
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<i><span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}"><span class="text_exposed_show">Islam itu telah meletakkan wanita di suatu tempat yang tinggi.</span></span></i></div>
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<span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}"><span class="text_exposed_show">Sorry for anything, I just don't know why I'm suddenly overly passionate about this, but then again what is not to be passionate about <i>tulang rusuk kiri sendiri</i>? Stay in school and I love you guys like I always had.</span></span></div>100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com5Glasgow, Glasgow City G1 1PU, UK55.8581553 -4.241890455.8559273 -4.2468259 55.8603833 -4.2369549tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-87519715501605259042012-02-16T17:58:00.000-08:002012-02-16T18:07:18.083-08:00Five Minutes Duration of Writing (Zizan Razak, Kaka - Bawaku Pergi)Assalamualaikum kids? How's life? Haha, yeah...I know I have other better, much important things to do now, but still, I cant help but to type in few words, no worries, Im gonna make it quick, I have an assignment, a coursework to submit tomorrow.<br />
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I don't really have anything to say, but just like the feeling of striking the keyboard. I dont't know at what point in life writing is becoming some sort of passion, maybe I feel it the same way when I was running, even I may not feel the breeze against my tanned face, however I just feel like I am doing something important by typing in my thoughts, it like I am progressing, moving forward as I did in running (unless you ran backward that is).<br />
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Frankly speaking, I don't have any ideas about anything to say. What's on my mind now is mostly friends in Malaysia, and I felt like running as well, no, not running from reality literally. Okay, let's find a topic.<br />
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Hmm, okay, gotcha! <i>Ayah ingin cerita tentang proses pentarbiyyahan, mungkin sedikit konservatif, dan radikal dari beberapa sudut, tapi agama merupakan salah satu fitrah manusia, sesuatu yang memang ada pada zahirnya, kerana manusia itu lemah, dan hanya dengan kebergantungan mereka kepada yang Maha Esa bisa menjadikan mereka gagah, merentasi lautan, mendaki gunung, dan teruskan mencabar diri; supaya mereka lebih sedar bahawa, setiap pencapaian, setiap kejayaan, setiap halangan yang berjaya kita tempuhi dapat diatasi hanya dengan bersandarkan kepada Ilahi.</i><br />
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<i>Ayah tidak pandai sama sekali untuk memberikan suatu didikan agama yang meruncing, tapi jangan risau, kerana Islam itu mencakupi, menyentuh setiap aspek kehidupan kita; dan bersama akan kita kupasnya satu persatu, kerana ayah sendiri masih jahil, dan serba kekurangan Astagfirullah al-azim.</i><br />
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I will tell you guys more later, for now I have a coursework to submit; <i>kepala pening</i>. My friend had helped me alot. And that's why kids, <i>jangan sombong, kerana orang yang sombong secara automatiknya adalah bodoh, mereka tidak dapat berkongsi ilmu dengan sahabat-sahabat yang lain. </i>Study<i> rerajin</i>, love you guys, like I always had :-)100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com3University of Strathclyde Glasgow - John Anderson Campus, 3 Parsonage Row, Glasgow, Glasgow City G1 1PU, UK55.8580273 -4.241532755.8557993 -4.2464682 55.860255300000006 -4.2365971999999994tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-42340842440174779252012-02-14T18:17:00.000-08:002012-02-14T18:35:59.806-08:00Tempat Jatuh Lagi Dikenang, Inikan Pula Tanah AirAssalamualaikum kids, hows life? I always wondered what it feels like to be independent. I realized few things today, that is, like for example one of them, as much as I want to be here, I too realize that this is just not my place, no matter how hard I tried, but things are not gonna be the same. and as much i tried cooking curry, or put in lots of tomato sauce, in doesnt change the fact I am asian who prefers reallly hot and spicy stuff.<br />
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But most important of all, lets not forget that I really miss my friends and family in Kuala Lumpur. I have come to a conclusion, that is, that few things that made a certain a place great is not by the tourist attraction destination it could offer or the culture, or the food, or the beauty of the vicinity, for such thing can only accommodate or fulfill such urges, to certain extent we will become bored eventually, BUT if we were in our rightful place, where the sense of belonging was no longer an alienated feeling, and above it all, having to see the familiar faces that lights up our static emotion everyday definitely one of God's greatest gift one could ask for.<br />
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In Scotland today, they are pretty much striving and anticipating, trying to secure their own independence. But the opposition comes from lots of parties and people, the society being to follow the leadership of England for so long had made me wonder what it feels like to witness an independence, to be able to witness something that will be mark down in the history of men, just like Malaysia which had gained their independence as early in 1957<br />
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People are living hardships today; sustainability, things that could endanger the ecosystems appears, and people, the society starts to paranoid, afraid of their dark shadows that as much they realize its existence, but continues to take it for granted, until the effect had become so severe that is beyond the comprehension of our limited mental faculties; however in resolving such issue, one can only start small, from its origin, from the main source; themselves.<br />
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I don't really know where I am leading on this issue, or what ever the issue is all about, or how things are starting to make abrupt introductions in the catastrophic world, but nevertheless, there's a solution for very problem; it always has. But, there's a saying that we can show a horse to a river, but wen can never force it to drink. And, calling off good decisions are the few aspects we lack, even as we realized the truth, the pros and cons of every options; but we still opt for the worse, or worst choices, because we are scared, intimidated, we are afraid that things are no longer the same, we prefer to be in the comfortable zone when we know, when we realize that one can always improve, step their game up and bringing it to the next unimaginable level by continue to challenge, by continue fighting, for what is rightfully theirs.<br />
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Who said that the road to independence will be easy? Who said that it's gonna a smooth ride to winning? and sustaining, managing your own country is not difficult and challenging? But I can say, nothing beats the sweet victory, the feeling of knowing that you own your country, that you are doing the best for your home, for your beloved land, beloved countrymen, and for all these things you had in mind, if you were to make them a priority, a must, a stressing factor in every fight, in every obstacles that you came across, you my friend, with God's grace, will come out triumphant.<br />
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I see people in doubt, and i tried assure them with words, as empty as it could, but with clear, honest words, so that they realize the feeling that I felt. I did not fight for independence, but my parents did, my grandparents did, and I believed they had sacrificed soo much for what we have today, for a greater, brighter future generation, thus I can see a clear difference between the fight for independence between what Malaysia had and what Scotland is trying to achieve.<br />
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<i> Jika ingin terbang bebas seperti burung, belajarlah mengibas sayap walaupun pada </i></div>
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<i>awalnya takut untuk jatuh</i></div>
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I will always love you Malaysia, for what ever the things that I will do is for the sake of your best interest, for a brighter future for my children, for a future that is not too late, for a future that I can shape with my own barehands, for a future that is not so far away, for all these things, like I always had.100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com0University of Strathclyde Glasgow - John Anderson Campus, 3 Parsonage Row, Glasgow, Glasgow City G1 1PU, UK55.8581553 -4.241890455.8224988 -4.3208544 55.8938118 -4.1629264tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-21875666370473428062012-02-06T16:38:00.000-08:002012-02-06T16:41:57.637-08:00Seratus Kebahagian dan Peristiwa, serta Infiniti Penzahiran RasaAssalamualaikum kids? MasyaAllah, how's life? Yeah, I realized that it's my 100th post, yey! Haha, naah, <i>saja je</i> excited. I dont really know what to say tho, just let my muscular (<i>ek eleh</i>) hands, stroke the dark, antic keyboard as gentle as possible, and trying to look as if im typing my dissertation or doing important things whatsoever. Nevertheless, I really dont know what to say tho, Im kinda speechless....literally.<br />
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Today, I woke up, feeling cold (like always) and almost late to class (like always again). So as I went out, I saw hot chicks! Naah, the lonely cold win of february strikes in, with a thick mist, surrounding the vicinity, and Glasgow city was blurry for almost within like 100 meters probably. I crossed the slippery road, in a much fast stead manner, hoping that I will make it to the class. And, unfortunately, it had already started though, but I still make my way to my seat and listen attentively...for 10 minutes, haha, naah.<br />
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<i>Pegi kelas ikut jalan ni; sempat amik gamba?Padan la lambat!</i></div>
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After that, I went for a jogging in the park nearby, somewhere below the High Street, near the River Clyde, it's called Glasgow Green. There's a saying, that the grass always look greener on the other side of the fence, and it did. <br />
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<i>Ayah teruskan melangkah, dalam kepekatan kabus yang menyelubungi, penglihatan bertambah kabur, tetapi ironiknya, keindahan alam itu masih terasa. Adakalanya, apabila sesuatu itu lekat di hati, maka kecantikan itu akan sentiasa terserlah walaupun pada zahirnya tidak lagi kelihatan; mungkin tidak di mata orang lain, tetapi di dalam hati kita, hanya tuhan sahaja yang mengetahuinya.</i><br />
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<i>Hidup, tidak ubah seperti suatu perjalanan, suatu persinggahan, dan sepanjang perjalanan ini kita akan melampaui pelbagai kesukaran, dan kepayahan. Tiada siapa yang mengatakan hidup ini akan mudah. Maka apa yang boleh kita hanya lakukan hanyalah terus melangkah, ke hadapan, walau betapa perlahan, betapa kecil kita melangkah.</i><br />
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<i>Amik gamba lagi time nak pegi kelas, laagi la lambat!!</i></div>
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<i>Hidup ayah, tidak ubah seperti jalan yang diselubungi kabus ini; ayah tidak nampak apa yang berada di hadapan, hanya mampu terus melangkah, dengan harapan akan menemui destinasi yang diinginkan. Ayah keliru, kaku, terkesima dengan jalan-jalan, kebarangkalian, kemampuan dan kelebihan serta kekurangan diri. Apa yang ingin ayah lakukan selepas ini? Ke mana hala tuju kehidupan? Adakah ayah akan pilih suatu jalan itu kerana jalan itu mudah? atau hanya itu sahaja jalan yang ada? Persoalan-persoalan ini timbul satu persatu.</i><br />
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<i>Ayah ada keinginan untuk menjadi jurutera</i><br />
<i>Ayah minat juga</i> project management<br />
<i>Ayah minat juga</i> planning.<br />
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<i>TETAPI</i><br />
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<i>Allah jua sebaik-baik jurutera,</i><br />
<i>Allah jua sebaik-baik </i>project manager<i>,</i><br />
<i>dan Allah jua sebaik-baik perancang</i><br />
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<i>Dan hidup ayah, dan hidup kamu, adalah sesuatu yang telah dirancang, dan Dia telah mengambil kira pelbagai faktor, pelbagai kemungkinan dan kebarangkalian, setiap input yang hambaNya berikan. Sesungguhnya, kesudahan yang baik itu, adalah bagi orang-orang yang beriman.</i><br />
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<i>Hari ni</i>, I went to see my lecturer, Prof. Joe Clarke, because I failed his paper in last semester's exam. And he gave me sum reassuring words, and advices, saying he will try his best not to fail me, and such.<br />
"Professor, is there any way you can give me 2 marks more for my paper?"<br />
"We have to discuss this with your course coordinator..."<br />
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.<br />
.<br />
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"Okay, noted Prof. Ill keep in touch"<br />
"Hey, can you do me a favour?"<br />
"Yeah?"<br />
"Cheer up kid. You're not failing this subject, don't worry. Don't let failure or success determine your happiness. Maybe under certain circumstances you failed, but maybe next time you wont. Don't let it be in your way from feeling happy. Cheer up!"<br />
"Thanks Prof."<br />
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Recently, <i>pada hari sabtu lepas, kawan baik ayah, pakcik Sufian korang, telah bertunang dengan makcik Sarina. Ingat tak kita ada pegi rumah diorang aritu? (banyak sangat berangan ni!)</i>. <br />
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<i>mengimbau kembali zaman kanak-kanak riang :-)))</i></div>
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<i>nasib baik ayah takda kat sana, kalau tak habis dah kena tekel semua bridesmaids </i></div>
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<i>(haha, bajet sangat :-p)</i></div>
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<i>Sufian bin Roslan, Sarina binti Saleh, semoga setapak lebih mendekati gerbang perkahwinan, setapak lebih dekat menyempurnakan separuh dari agama diri, setapak lebih dekat menuju kebahagian; sentiasalah bersama di kala sukar dan senang, selagi terdaya akan aku hulurkan bantuan, insyaAllah.</i> Thanks for everything.<br />
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And seeing one of my best friends getting engaged, one step closer to
getting married made me think about few things too, about myself
definitely. But I'll save that for later. I have other important things to do now. I have sacrificed so many things to come here and pursue my knowledge. And if I were to waste this opportunity, how can I ever face him again? How can I ever face your grandma kan? So, keep your priorities straight Hanafiah!!! *<i>tidak semena-mena berlari</i>*<br />
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Oh, recently I was elected to be one of the AJKs in the Glasgow Malaysian Community. More responsibility, more opportunities to improve myself, more work too...I guess? I...can't be thankful enough tho.<i> Ingat, anak panah yang tidak meninggalkan busur tidak akan mengenai sasarannya.</i><br />
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<i>Masa depan yang belum pasti, sama seperti bumi yang diselubungi kabus; hanya dengan menjejakinya sahaja dapat kita pastikan sejauh mana kebenaran hakikat yang kita dambakan</i></div>
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<i>(Gambar kredit pakcik Hazwan korang, heh) </i></div>
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<i>Terima kasih banyak-banyak tidak terhingga. Jazakallah khayran. Ayah sayang korang sentiasa</i>, like I always had :-)100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com4University of Strathclyde Glasgow - John Anderson Campus, 3 Parsonage Row, Glasgow, Glasgow City G1 1PU, UK55.8580811 -4.241455755.8491691 -4.2611967 55.8669931 -4.2217147000000006tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-74652630601816909362012-01-26T15:19:00.000-08:002012-01-26T15:55:18.073-08:00Sesudah Suku AbadAssalamualaikum kids..how's life? Emm, I just finished exam, so...well, things havent been good lately, with the papers dat is...sigh. I was really blur and nervous at times during the exam, so I guess things may not turn up fine for me. But, there are many aspiring outcomes dat I got from such situation tho. Like for example I went to the library, staying from morning til late in the night, I realized dat to be surrounded by books and knowledge is not a bad thing after all, and this is something that I can do until the end of life<br />
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<i>J</i><i>ika ilmu itu dilambangkan dengan buku, </i></div>
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<i>Maka aku gembira berada di perpustakaan, arkib dan toko buku;</i></div>
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<i>Jika ilmu itu dimiliki oleh cendiakawan, ahli ulama', dan mereka yang mahir,</i></div>
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<i>Maka aku selesa mendampingi mereka;</i></div>
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<i>Dan jika ilmu itu dapat dizahirkan melalui sikap penyabar dan berkasih sayang,</i></div>
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<i>Maka aku bahagia mengasihi mereka</i><br />
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-Andersonian Library, Strathclyde University, 5 Jan 2012</div>
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Eversince after SPM, I realized that calculations and numerical-solving skill was no longer my strongest traits, and I felt left out miserably. And today, these exams are the mark and testament of my failures. But still, being humane, we cant help but to feel some strong attachment to things that we can't have. </div>
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But knowledge is not something that we can't have; everyone is just capable of excelling in whatever they love given the fact that they practice and put more effort into it, nonetheless my effort may be insufficient to cater such intricate, complex calculation; well, not really dat complex, is just i may had mixed up my formulas, haha.</div>
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<i>Tuhan tu memang Maha Kaya</i>. Prior to coming here, I was always worried how thing will end up, with my coursework, assignments and meeting the dateline and such, however to certain extent, God had accompanied me with few friends dat definitely helped me a lot during these days. I was not alone, we all helped each others, and he pointed, taught so many things despite the numerous, tremendous amount of wondering question striking at every point during study sessions was answered in a calm, slow manner for the sake of my better comprehension of the subject, I could never thank your uncle Xu Gu, oh, we have to go to China if we want to meet him, ngeeh :-p</div>
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Hmm...so, soon after that dat, as I finished my exams on the Friday the 20th of Jan, it was my birthday....again. You see guys, there are so many things that can happen within one year. Back then when I was a kid, I spent most of my time playing games at home, doing indoory kinda stuff. And being developed and exposed to such activities for quite some years, I tend to be more introverted and less sociable, despite the fact I do enjoy others' companion, I prefer to be alone mostly at times. </div>
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But then ur uncle Sufian pulled me away from all these negativity. I started to open up more, and communicate more, I went out, and enjoy the companion of others. I took up football again, started jogging, started to appreciate the wonderfulness and the greatness of God's creation from the beauty of the vicinity, and I felt that deep in my heart. Nevertheless, my social skills was still miniscule thus it was insufficient for me to find your mum, haha, kidding. And due to certain stigma, unwanted experience, due to my ambition to be involving in academia and teaching, I will try to improve my social skills more; slowly, but surely. And without realizing it, I have some sort of attachment to my friends, and the desperate need to be part of their life, the neediness of involving in each activity they were doing suddenly develops. I started to be wanting to be part of something real, something that you could never get from virtual reality, from video games, something real, and that is a strong sense of brotherhood and friendship. </div>
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So, few months after coming to Glasgow, most of my friends, as if having some sort of understanding between them, a conspiracy or something, starting to get married! Lots of them getting married! Wow, and I am indeed missing a big part in their important days in life. And that sucks, a lot. I really waaant to be there. And few months to come, my friend is going to get married, and I could have been his best-man...sigh. I was lost for quite sometime, waning and somberness kicks in, but in a much less serious, less detrimentally affecting. </div>
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But like I said, <i>Tuhan itu Maha Kaya</i>. I met lots of people, lots of GOOODDD people, that has the capabilities of being a wonderful, dedicated friend, despite no matter how bad the person I am. I still remember vividly the day I came, as I pave my way out of the airport, and the first Malaysian dat I met was Ustaz Abduh. He thought me lots of things, religious matters dat I always found mysteriously compelling and touching, maybe most of his advices reflected on my negative traits, and in some way he helped me in becoming a better muslim.</div>
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Soon, I met uncle Safwan Romli (<i>pakcik Wanli</i>), he showed me around the city, with your uncle Deris. We went to the city center, helped me open a bank account, and showed important places like the post office here. After that I remembered meeting other guys like <i>pakcik</i> Faiz Nordin, <i>pakcik</i> Masrul, lecturer-lecturer <i>ayah kat miat dulu, pakcik</i> Hafizi, <i>pakcik</i> Wan Adlan,<i> pakcik</i> Shahrul, then I met the pharmacy clan; <i>pakcik</i> Hazwan Samian, <i>pakcik</i> Safwan Ghazali (<i>pakcik</i> Wanji), <i>pakcik</i> Ridhwan Razak (<i>pakcik</i> Due), makcik Azleen Azreen Azmi (<i>makcik</i> Leen?)<i>, makcik</i> Izyani Nabila Ibrahim (<i>makcik</i> Bee?<i> tak, dia tak sengat orang</i>), <i>makcik</i> Fairuz (<i>makcik ni mungkin sengat orang</i>, haha), <i>makcik</i> Amirah Mohd Sedek (<i>makcik ni makan perlahan</i>, vogue <i>kontrol ayu gitu</i>), <i>makcik</i> Syifaa Aminudin (<i>makcik yang ceria</i>), <i>makcik</i> Farah...Izyan? (<i>makcik dua nama</i>?), <i>makcik</i> Anis Wahid (<i>makcik yang buat ayah ingat teringat kepada makcik lain</i>), <i>makcik</i> Farrah Kamarudin <i>dan beberapa makcik lain yang mgkn ayah tak ingat kot nama diorang.</i><br />
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Dan ada the Naval Architecture gangs, uncle Ganesh Kumar, <i>pakcik</i> Kamal,<i> pakcik</i> Affan, <i>makcik </i>Georgina? <i>makcik</i> Elaine? hmm...which also the member of Strathclyde Photography club dan there are other few people as well whom I met from football which is <i>pakcik</i> Farihan (<i>pakcik</i> cip), <i>pakcik</i> Azpin (<i>pakcik</i> Ipin). Besides that, there's also the colony of Triple E's (Electrical and Electronic Engineering) <i>pakcik</i> Aizat (pak jat) and <i>pakcik</i> Deris as well as the Architecture groupie which was <i>makcik</i> Ana Dew (<i>makcik anadu</i>?) dan <i>pakcik</i> Najib <i>serta</i> uncle Shazwi <i>dan</i> uncle Asfa. But the lists did not stop there for I did not include my fellow companions from Brunei, pakcik Salleh, dan pakcik Faiz Sidek as well a fellow Malaysian, chemical student,<i> pakcik</i> Najhan. And last I met my African coursemate, Ugonna Mmbaezeu (uncle Ugo) <br />
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In case you're wondering why was i so eager in meeting new people, making friends and such; there was this one time in life when I really wanted this particular girl and I did everything in my power to make her feel the same way I did, but on the verge of the failure she said to me this<br />
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"No worries Hanafiah, we'll meet lots of other new people"<br />
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New...people... *sigh*<br />
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And the other reason is, I just thought it would be reaaallly nice to have friends, that we can share thoughts, pain and laughter together, despite all the shortcomings that each of us had, we tend to complement each other with extra capabilities that we had. It's just nice, to be in a place where we all feel to be appreciated, and wanted, for I had been living my whole life, feeling unwanted, ever since waaay before I was born. Any other reasons? Let's just say that I really want to improve myself, reeeaaaaallly bad. And improving social skills is definitely gonna help me a lot if I were to be into academia and teaching. Teaching sort of like one would normally said "it runs in the family" :-)<br />
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<i>Tulis saja, tapi tak buat sangat, ngeh</i> :-/</div>
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And thus today, all these writings are the testament of how I will never let such thing happened again; I will not let the history repeats itself. I wish you guys, my beloved friends, the best in life and to my beloved kids, for all the things that will come, I will never, ever forget my responsibility as a father.<br />
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So, back to the birthday, I cant thank you guys enough, I reaaaaaaaalllllllyyyy do. I am indeed speechless. <i>Terharu, gembira</i> especially<i> bila fikir</i> that I didnt know you guys that long; <i>dan sedih sebab teringat kawan2 di malaysia lebih2 lagi ramai gila yang dah kahwin </i>recently, dan i wonder how my mum would react to these things. <i>Terima kasih kepada</i> triple <i>pakcik</i> wan (Hazwan, Safwan dan Ridhwan) <i>serta makcik-makcik lain (atau kakak-kakak?</i> nah, im sticking to <i>makcik, baru sama kan?</i> haha).<br />
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<i>Banyak gila makanan, syukur</i> alhamdulillah, happy crazy! </div>
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So <i>ayah dah 25 tahun skang, dan</i> from my writings you can see that I may not be a fully matured, grown up person I am supposed to, but still, I know how far I have improved, thus I am keeping such perspective to myself and people around me. It's quite a personal entry (and looong indeed), but I choose to write it anyway, for the sake of memorabilia, for all these good times, I wish it will continue despite how old we will become, despite the hardships that each of us will face in life. As much I am trying to find your mum, I need to focus on my studies first, because if she were to appear in my mind, she'll occupy half of my brain capacity, so i need that capacity for much important things for the moment, which is knowledge, that I had sacrificed so much in trying to gain.<br />
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this cake is crazy delicious!</div>
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MasyaAllah, crazy2 <i>saja ayah</i> lately. <br />
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From the bottom of my heart, <i>terima kasih bebanyak untuk makanan-makanan yang sedap, pengalaman yang tidak terkata, persahabatan dan ukhwah yang telah terjalin . Syukur </i>Alhamdulillah<i>.</i><br />
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<i>Semoga kesudahan yang baik bagi kita semua.</i><br />
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Jazakallahu khayran. I will always love you guys, and you guys definitely, like I always had. <br />
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<br /></div>100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com6James Blyth Court, University of Strathclyde Glasgow - John Anderson Campus, Glasgow, Glasgow City G4, UK55.8611128 -4.239854955.8588848 -4.2447904 55.8633408 -4.2349194tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-28135083665949057782011-12-31T16:30:00.000-08:002011-12-31T16:30:02.957-08:00New Year 2012<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Assalamualaikum kids. It's a new year's eve, so like usual, there are times in life I need to have views, and reflecting on my past year. It's cool, there are so many things happened, so many transitions, but with God's grace I am still able to stand. <br />
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The building near George Square</div>
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The clock tower from High Street</div>
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There are just time I like wander around aimlessly, seeing things, and have a fresh perspective on life, and start mapping out my next move onwards. What ever it is, happy new year kids, and I will always love you guys, like I always had</div>100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com0George Square, Glasgow, Glasgow City G2 1DS, UK55.8617018 -4.25084155.8572468 -4.2607115 55.8661568 -4.2409705tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-69725099364289753332011-12-30T20:59:00.000-08:002011-12-30T21:08:22.471-08:00Five Minutes Song Duration of Writing (Michael Learns To Rock - Ghost of You)<i>Assalamualaikum. Ingin ayah coretkan rasa yang mengamit ketika menjangkau setiap inci bumi asing ini.</i><br />
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<i>Kadang kala,</i></div>
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<i>Manusia tidak dapat lari,</i></div>
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<i>Antara nafsu dan cinta,</i></div>
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<i>yang lara dan hakiki </i></div>
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<i>Cinta pada zahir,</i></div>
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<i>Bukan pada akal,</i></div>
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<i>Kita mahir,</i></div>
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<i>Tapi bebal</i></div>
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<i><br /></i></div>
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<i>Jika hati dan cinta,</i></div>
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<i>retorik semata-mata</i></div>
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<i>apakah ini yang aku rasa?</i></div>
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<i><br /></i></div>
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<i>Hanya padaNya sahaja,</i></div>
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<i>Hak cinta kita,</i></div>
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<i>dan getaran ini,</i></div>
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<i>Kuasa Ilahi</i></div>
<i><br /></i><br />
<i>Kadangkala, dalam hidup, kita diberi pilihan, dan retrospeksi kehidupan mengajar kita utk lebih matang, tetapi sejauh manakah kita dapat mengikut teori kehidupan yang kita inginkan, dan ada kalanya, ketika kekosongan memasuki setiap rongga dan saraf jiwa dan nurani, ilham-ilham dan idea-idea menerpa minda, memberi salam kepada sesiapa yang ingin memberi kebenaran kepada ilham dan idea ini terbentuk, dan ada kalanya, di sebalik ironiknya setiap peristiwa hanya mendekatkan kita pada fitrah, dan siapa lagi yang lebih afdal untuk membincangkan fitrah diri selain Sang Pencipta yang Maha Berkuasa; dan ada kalanya, antara kadang kala yang terjadi dapat memberikan manfaat kepada diri, dan untuk itu, ayah mendoakan kesudahan yang baik bagi kita, kerana kesudahan yang baik adalah bagi orang-orang yang beriman. Wallahu a'lam. </i><br />
<br />
Ive been living in the past too much, Ive enjoyed so many rides with my time machine ticket.<br />
<br />
It's really time to forgive, forget and move on.<br />
<br />
I love you guys like I always had :-)100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com0University of Strathclyde, Parsonage Row, Glasgow, Glasgow City G1 1PU, UK55.8580660646938 -4.241838455200195355.8491530646938 -4.2615794552001951 55.8669790646938 -4.2220974552001955tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-36209242932344203502011-12-29T17:11:00.000-08:002011-12-29T17:13:08.822-08:00Photographs not Physics, Chemistry or V vs T GraphAssalamualaikum kids. People had often ask me this "why I love taking pictures so much?" despite the poor quality of my photographs dat is, haha. I'd usually smile, and continue snappin' and I slowly explain things like I love taking candid pictures, impromptu attitudes that are reflected on the facial expression as I press on the shutter, but I often too forgot to clarify one thing; photographs for me is like sum sort of ticket for me to go back to the past it's like a small, miniature of time machine.<br />
<br />
I will always love you guys, like I always had :-))))100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-63448988337810064602011-12-29T14:50:00.000-08:002011-12-29T14:50:10.641-08:00Of Love, Faith and Speechless WordsAssalamualaikum kids? How's life? Hmmm, Im kinda speechless tonight....not, haha, kidding. I... dont know why, I dont know if any of you my beloved child, or any of my friends will go through this, having to doubt your ownself, and I guess, taking the lack of confidence into consideration, you might as well say we'll gonna be having such conversation again in the future, haha, but nevertheless, bear with me kids, I wont let you be emancipated from this one.<br />
<br />
I wonder about you guys, about my friends, that as much as things looked normal, fine to my four-naked eyes, I wonder if any one had doubts about what they are going through. And, looking from all those things I wrote from my adolescent years, I could be considered as a master of self-doubting. I don't know where the lack of confidence came in, but somehow I manage to squeeze in, fortunately tho.<br />
<br />
A friend once told me this, being good-natured is not enough, for people will take chances to scrutinize, belittling others as they pave their negative way up to the social hierarchy, thus it's best for us to step up to these kind of injustice if we want to bring positive and goodness to others. His words made me think, made me realize, that I really need to do something about myself, I need to step up, I need to take my game to the next level, always aim higher than you expected, but put on small, achievable milestones as you progress so that measuring your success wont be so hard.<br />
<br />
Recently, I...really, really miss...I...am speechless, again. I...guess, maybe I'm just not feeling well. <br />
<br />
I will always love you guys, like I always had.100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-8317779237719986722011-12-27T04:43:00.000-08:002011-12-27T04:46:51.388-08:00Edinburgh, The People, Culture, Landscapes and LoveAssalamualaikum kids? How's life? Recently I had the chance to go to Edinburgh, other than that I didnt do anything much really. So, as I was commuting by the train, few ideas stroke my mind, like I always had, haha. Nevertheless, it was fun considering I didnt do anything much this holiday, and cramping up in my room seems a little bit ridiculous but the idea of going somewhere didnt strike my mind for I was kinda worried about my exams and assignments. These feelings of being alone in the room, with pile of things to study is faaaaar better than doing nothing at all, and having the opportunity to meet new friends, broadening my horizons by surrounding the goodness in people that I met is by faaaaar better than not doing anything at home in Malaysia; but I do miss your grandma tho.<br />
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And I pray that i will always get to meet and befriend new people and see new places. But for that, I wish that I will be able to secure a job before I finish my studies here. Love you guys, like I always had :-))100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com0A7, Edinburgh, City of Edinburgh, UK55.953236567487188 -3.189210891723632855.951014067487186 -3.194146391723633 55.95545906748719 -3.1842753917236326tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-44668361166497321352011-12-15T17:42:00.000-08:002011-12-15T17:42:31.514-08:00Eid Al AdhaI cant sleep yet, my mind's kinda wandering for sum unknown reason, like always. Nevertheless, it often tells me to sleep. It? Yeah, my body, yet my mind urges to keep on striking this dusty old Compaq keyboard laptop.<br />
<div><br />
</div><div>Eid Al Adha is around the corner, and I admit, having to come here for only like a month or so, had made me miss home, even more, especially considering that I never actually, technically leave home as long as I would now, thus this feelings kinda developing and starts to ripped my sanity, only I choose to suppress it and keep it aside, as long as I could. This feelings, the sense of loneliness doesnt really occur when u're in the classroom, or when u're doing your assignment, but as soon as the pitch black of the dark night comes creeping in, and the surrounding seems to be quiet, sumtimes it too quiet but just the moment that it gets to the freaky stage, BAM! your next door roomate, your flatmate came knocking to your door, oblivious of his actions and start to sing sum unknown song in sum foreign language, an alienated sound to your ear, but still convincing enough to know that he doesnt realize what the heck he was saying or doing all along. When this situation kicks in, and all of the necessary factors, igniters, falls into its rightful place, the sense of loneliness and homesick sparked, depends on the windy direction of moodswings, it can burst up to one powerful flame, a flame that rhetorically speaking, is not able to light up all the fire emergency alarm or trigger any smoke detectors.</div><div><br />
</div><div>Life's kinda busy, but that keeps me going. Assignment keeps me going...not really, haha. Recently, I have this aspiration, and sum sort of idea, and sum other things.<br />
<br />
Chill kids, I'm fine, no worries, I will always love you guys, like I always had :-)</div>100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-14194674902671066182011-12-15T17:38:00.001-08:002011-12-15T17:39:20.426-08:00The Few Little Things that Transcend DeathAssalamualaikum kids? How's life? Yeah, I just went back from a friend's birthday party. Yeah, it was really fun, and not to mention there's delicious foods as well. Yeah, happy besday to aunty Syifaa, yeah, I will introduce you guys to her, and the rest of the gang, uncle hazwan, safwan, ridhwan, then there's another uncle safwan, haha, and also not to forget the religious, pious uncle faiz. Oh, by the way I started my day with coming late to an appointment because i was stuck in the bathroom with broken door knob. So, I had to jump from the window, onto the bushes, half naked, with 3-4 degree Celsius in the environment, I ran quickly as I could. But enough on dat, just like the mood of vacation, and having to just went home from a birthday party had made me thinking, about few things.<br />
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In life, there are things that I hold on the most, and among these few things dat I held above others; one of them would be integrity, and sincerity. These principles, that I had been holding on for so long, that made me running thru thick and thin, despite all the negativity it occurs of implementing it, I daresay, that Im not fairest of all in this context, there are times I hold back, and I let negativity swoops in. However, having strong feeling for your set of principles, believe and continue holding onto em, no matter how harsh the situations or conditions are against it,even having the world against your set of beliefs, even the tides doesnt favor your way; if you continue holding on to em under this situation, you're already a man, my beloved kids. And these are the principles that your great grandpa had instilled into me, indirectly, ever since I was a kid.<br />
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You see, having to grow up without a father figure, I had definitely rely on these two people in accommodating the psychological need of a person called father; these are the guys that was my father-figure to me, in the early days of my life.<br />
<br />
So, I had always remember few taglines from my grandpa, from <i>atuk korang</i>. This happened when I was in standard one, aged seven years old and I just came back from school in the middle of ramadhan, the fasting month. Came back from the school, I ran to the kitchen, opened up the refrigerator and check if there's any food under the<i> tudung saji</i>. Yeah, I didn't fast back then, haha, hell no, you guys arent gonna get the same luxury I had, not fair? suck it up, im ur father after all, haha. Neway, I was sitting on the chair, and your grandpa, he will come.<br />
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"<i>Haa, tak puasa"</i><br />
<i>"Adik puasa separuh hari la tuk"</i><br />
<i>"Mana boleh puasa separuh-sparuh, puasa kena penuh"</i><br />
<i>"Tak tahan la tuk, penat lari, balik skolah lapa dah"</i><br />
<i>*sambil tersenyum* "puasa memang la lapa, semalam kata nak puasa,"</i><br />
<i>*terus makan*</i><br />
<i>"tau tak ni orang india cakap apa?"</i><br />
<i>"apa tuk?"</i><br />
<i>"cakap tak serupa bikin" *sambil tersenyum</i><br />
<br />
"<i>Cakap tak serupa bikin</i>" and I want you guys too, to remember this phrase, until the day you die. Your words are who you are, and never, ever be someone whom his words can't be trusted, never be someone who may say something, but acted totally different just to accommodate and fulfill his own negative agenda. If you are not able to say things dat you are not sure of, not ever being able to guarantee that you will act out to what you say, never in the slightest sane mind thought of saying anything, for people will claim all your words back, and they will quote the things, each single words that you said, and if you had acted differently people will lost faith, trust and will act differently. You will loose respect, and you relationship may never be the same. <br />
<br />
I had a friend, and he was doing the same thing. No, I didnt despise him or anything, i didnt hate him, but i think it's best if I just keep a certain space, because even though he's a friend, but things are no longer the same, ever. I just couldn't let myself to believe him, not anymore.<br />
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It's funny though, remembering my grandfather, in a foreign land. Never I thought I was able to come this far, it was of my slightest intention. I will make him proud, I will. Al-Fatihah to my grandfather, Haji Abdul Kadir bin Yunus, may he rest in peace. For all the things he did, all the principles and beliefs he sow deep in me, and all the religious teachings he taught, I can't thank him enough.<br />
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And never loose faith on me, as I will continue having faith on the great person you guys will be. I will love you guys, like I always had :-)100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-22803118053533748912011-12-15T17:38:00.000-08:002011-12-15T17:38:20.645-08:00It's Windy...Like Your MomAssalamualaikum kids? How's life? Recently the weather's been reaaaaallly unstable, yeah and I rarely see the sun, and even if it were to appear, it was only for a while, for brief second. I do miss Malaysia, and the weather, I do miss the seeing the white fluffy clouds, and the feeling of bright, warm glittering ray on the western hemisphere whenever the sun sets.<br />
<br />
Recently, on Thursday this week, which technically yesterday; my class was cancelled, because of the heavy gust of wind that reached about 90-80 mph. That's like reallly freaking fast, and standing in the middle of the road will definitely get you flown away if you're too skinny that is.<br />
<br />
So, as I was in the middle of the street, feeling the wind breeze blew against me, it was harsh, hard, strong in lots of ways that I may not be able to describe it, maybe not right now with my limited vocabulary that is.<br />
<br />
By the wind, I realized too, the empty hollow deep in the corner of my heart, beyond reach of light; and at some point, ironically u just want to be alone, and I felt that. I saw people passing by, walking up and down the streets, with heavy, thick sweaters and windbreakers as they pave their way on the wet, dark parchment of the road that endangers the pedestrian due to its slippery condition that was caused by the snow few days earlier. Seeing them, juggling between all these things, these criteria that is beyond their control, I realized too, that we may not be able to control the variables, the external factor that had been put or implemented upon us, but however, with God's grace, we can determine the factors, and the output of every effort that we put on, given that we put in enough inputs and allocating certain sufficient amount of effort.<br />
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So, when I feel the harsh wind, or the calm breeze on top of the high street (its a name of a road, yeah, pretty much ironic yet pun intended) I just don't know why but I just felt like it; like a woman;the wind is like a women, like any woman that had come into my life, the ones that had gone and still remained here. Nevertheless, like the last line from the last scene of a movie called 'A Walk to Remember' which was an adaptation from a novel, "her love is like the wind, I can's see her, but I can feel it" and I believed that's one of the true things in life. Women's love is like a wind, and guys are like wind turbines that continues to rotate to generate electricity. I am running out of words tho, there's no way winging it, but as much as I want to start propelling, to start generating something positive and contribute, environment and society; there are few things I need to improve, and certain things need to be accomplished, for there are other things that currently really, really matters to me.<br />
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Your mum, is a really-really great person. If I were to be successful one day in whatever I will be, for all the good things and great memories, for all these things to come, she will be my wind.<br />
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I will love you guys, like I always had.100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-81076961270821099682011-12-12T02:09:00.000-08:002011-12-12T02:09:12.175-08:00Coffee and Dark Chocolate<i>Assalamualaikum. Ayah suka minum kopi, susu, dan dark chocolate, dan</i> these little things make me happy (<i>ke</i> hyper?) even for a short while, masyaAllah.<br />
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<i>Ya Allah, walaupun kegembiraan ini hanya sementara, ayah berharap semoga ia lebih kerap hadir dalam hidup kita.</i><br />
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<i>Sayang korang</i> <i>dan</i> dont be a caffeine addict, like I always had :-/100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-41500552463294797362011-12-05T12:19:00.000-08:002011-12-05T12:19:50.596-08:00Speechyless ThoughtsAssalamualaikum kids? How's life? Hmmm, i am pretty speechless tonight. for there are too many things been bottling up my mind, thus I can see why being clairvoyance was one of the traits I can hardly acquire. Nevertheless, thank God for all the insights and perspective He had bestowed upon me, for all these perspectives are the few little things that made me separated apart from other people, thus I finally able to distinguish myself in quite a unique, perplexing way that may beyond the thinking of my brain capacity few years ago. I can now hold my head up high, and being able to walk on the path that I wanted, tho I admit the road, the end of this journey may have a doubtful ending; however I am determined to see it through until the end.<br />
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I will love you guys like I always had :-)))100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-68474350203174675822011-12-04T19:04:00.000-08:002011-12-04T19:12:25.393-08:00Snow, Life and Heart are Inter-RelatedAssalamualaikum kids? How's life? I am feeling kinda sentimental tonight, maybe it's because the over dosage of caffeine I suppose, nevertheless, im writing tonight (or early morning?) solely because it's snowing outside.<br />
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Yeah, it snows, why it's a big deal to me?Hmm, probably because Ive been living in Malaysia my whole life and I never, ever had the chance to fully experience one of God's wonders that beyond the capability of men; yeah, there may be sum sort of artificial snow in Genting, but it's not the same; for human creation always has its flaws and errors.<br />
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Snow, being very beautiful and scenic, is pretty much coold to begin with. The fact that I was shivering strongly even with the heater turned on gave me quite a headache, pretty much stirs up the reason to not ever coming here again. You see, back then in Malaysia, I was never good with cold things, I literally hate cold; and I dint know why. I don't drink cold drinks and my room is pretty much hot and any friends that came would definitely sweat, except me dat is. My body had been adapting to this kind of temperature for quite some time. And ironically, unbeknownst to my sane mind, I had choose Glasgow to further my studies. Not being able to cope up with this extreme weather definitely had taken its toll on me for few weeks, but as I started to play football almost 2 hours every week, and having to walk to classes and SUMSA (Strathclyde University Muslim Student Association) place for prayers, definitely had strengthen my body and had made me become more comfortable with the current weather.<br />
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The first few things that I realized about snow is that it's beautiful and yet simple; because the fact is that snow is just a collective of water, transformed and hardened into ice and falls down to earth; but God had made it soo beautiful that it perfected, thus it gave us an idea that even such simplest thing, if were to be acting on a huge amount, on much larger scale, it can be very graceful and captivating, so beautiful as well being breath-taking to any naive, humble and simplistic yet touching the heart to the eyes of beholder.<br />
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People had asked me "<i>seronok main snow</i>?" and I'd rather say not for I am enjoying this alone. It was kinda lonely to be witnessing something reaaaally-really great and awesome as this by yourself. God's best wonders in the world are not meant to be watched and gasped for your eyes only. It takes friends, and family members to share these experiences. I never liked being alone, I never did. It sucks, big time. The snow is not alone as well, when it fell on the surface of the earth, it comes in large bundle, a huge amount of quantity that becomes so beautiful and could cause impact and affect people's hearts, affecting enough for them to get out from their cozy warmness of the blanket and hot, expensive, money-draining heater to be showered and emblazoned with cold in the middle of the night; thus i concluded it is affecting enough to touch other people's hearts. I wanna be like snow too, I want to make impact on the world, to be successful, not alone, but having my friends and companions fighting on the same path to success, and we will become a role models, and example to each one and another; to be more successful in life; and I want to do this, together, like snow.<br />
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I realized, one of the significance of having snow showering this humble earth is a sign to human, a lesson for men, and a great reflection on our daily life. You see, life and snow is pretty much inter related; for hardships and obstacles that we face in life is like the cold that nobody wanted, and it's kinda suck to have to undergo all these for the target we wanted to acquire; and snow, is pretty much the success, the beauty of achieving something we desired sooo long and the cold, or obstacles only made our victory much sweeter.The good things in life, the better and the best is yet to come, but there's always a price that we must pay, and effort we have to show, something that we must give away in order to feel whatever the good things we wanna feel.<br />
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Kids, I wills study hard, hopefully. I will always love you guys like I always had.100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-76100500088443368272011-12-01T03:32:00.000-08:002011-12-01T03:32:59.502-08:00Five Minutes Song Duration of Writing (Pearl Jam - Last Kiss)Assalamualaikum kids, how's life? Hmm, I know, my introduction had always been the same, kind dull eh? Haha, but I believe this too, that in life, this small seem no meaningful things are the little things that we sought after.<br />
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Recently, I watched this advertisement, on the net, on the social networking website, regardless what ever you guys will call it in the future, but mine was pretty much addicting enough. So, the advertisement was about sumone, an Indian woman, who seem to be in her late 50's I guess. At that moment, she was about to give a speech at her husband's funeral. It started to sound absurd and ridiculously funny at first, but then as the speech rolled on, people started to realize the message she was trying to convey.<br />
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At first she told, at her husband's funeral, how hard his husband farted at night, during sleep, and how his snoring sounded like, almost identical to a revving sound of a motorboat (or car?) engine. However, these small things are the little things she miss, these trivial matters are the sign, the indication that her husband was alive; and she can proceed her day with these trivial, that may seem ridiculously funny for others, but the most valuable and precious for her; and these what made her day. And now, ever since her husband had passed away, she's been realizing this, how significant, and distinctive it was to her; and it may sounded funny but there's nothnig she can do except but to sadly reminiscing and laughing amused at the thoughts, these funny memorabilia of her late husband.<br />
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People...wait, that's kinda unfair to collectively judge people; okay, I am one of those who always take things for granted. Ever since I was a kid, I realize, that there's no way you could ever cheat death, and as a muslim, I always believe that death, can always come in whatever way, or whatever methods that can be unthinkable to the logic of the limited brain capacity of men, and it can strike at whatever time regardless whether we're prepared or not.<br />
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When I was a kid, I always had a fight with your wan (gramma) and usually it will involves her not buying the toys that I wanted. And I usually would persuade her for days, and months,; yeah, dont judge me, i wont let you guys do the same, haha, neway, most of the time, when she was fed up or really stressed out at work with her other problems, and with me adding up to the stress she already had at her limit, she would suddenly take a car and drive somewhere, gone. I hate it when she did that, because of the fact I strongly believe that death can happen anytime, anywhere and to anyone God chooses to. And, to top it off, I watched too many Japanese serial dramas, malay soap operas, cerekarama, telenovela...no, i am not drama addict, no, haha, it's just that these stories, they usually end up in tragedies.<br />
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And I believe that all of us, will never want to depart with our loved ones in a strong, aggressive, argumentative confrontations, because I loved her, I really do, it's just that I can be very selfish at times and I pray to God not to execute my selfishness with unbearable tragedy that I could really figure out.<br />
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Life is very valuable, as well as your relationship to others; it's important to love yourself and at the same time loving your family and friends, and build up good relationship with your colleagues of different races, cultures and creed. Treat others the way you wanted to be treated, and with God's grace you will end up fine, even without me around.<br />
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Regardless of whatever argumentation, confrontation, or discussions we had, or even we're unable to embrace each other in the last counting minutes on earth, and holding onto each other for a little while seems to be the most, longest precious moments we had, or if else fails; I will always love you like I always had.100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-59362909137574443662011-11-26T16:05:00.000-08:002011-11-26T16:06:48.616-08:00Salam Maal HijrahAssalamualaikum kids? Em, Im kinda speechless today, but nevertheless, it wont stop me from saying things. Today is Maal Hijrah, a new year in the Islamic calendar. It's a fresh start all over again. Talking about fresh start, I was among the fortunate ones, to be given the opportunity to press the hypothetical 'restart' button in my life, and all the f**ked up things that I did, I was given the chance to redo and redo and redo it all over again.<br />
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But my question is, why, on what logic basis for us human to continue making the same mistake all over again when we know such thing is hazardous, endangering and threatening to ourselves? What kind of mental model do we adapt for us to adapt such way? Does the world capitalism lead to these bad things; these negativity bottled up in one rotting soul? is it the overpopulation? is it the question of faith? is it the question of phase and period? or perhaps could this be just an illusion to make things complicated? what gives? I too dont seem to find the real answer behind it.<br />
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Recently, i had a discussion, with people we had dialogues but i was pretty much keeping things to myself, i was scared, i was afraid to speak up, i was overly conscious, and having practice giving presentations in classes and training still cant help me overcome my public anxiety. I kept things quiet until the end. I was the less productive, the most non contributing person in the class, however until the end, i tried summing up all the things they said.<br />
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All the things that happened in this world, is because of us, it is because of ourselves; we choose to walk on the route to wherever we're going today, and by God's grace, we're reaching there; and if the world is overpopulated, if the world is becoming congested, if the world had suddenly fall upon us, IT ALL HAPPENS BECAUSE WE CHOOSE TO BE IN THAT WAY, and there's no way winging it. We are what we are today because we choose to be that way, and why procrastinate? If we dont like what we are today, so step up and make the right decision that will befit your soul and soothes your heart, but let me tell you this; those things that we thought are the best things for us could end up being the other way around, and vice versa.<br />
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We never know about the future, but know this;<i> sesungguhnya setiap yang baik itu datangnya dari Allah s.w.t. dan setiap yang buruk itu datangnya dari kelemahan dan kekurangan diri kita sendiri</i>. I cant say much kids, u know the decisions you're going to take, and i hope you guys will be wise enough in making decisions for those are the traits that i dont have and i've always sought after. Love your life kids, if you're thinking you're making the wrong turn in life, u can always go backtrack. And if you're lost, there's always the Quran and Hadith to guide you back on the right track. I will love you guys, like I always had :-)100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-38586938229894014922011-11-24T17:22:00.000-08:002011-11-26T16:08:46.233-08:00Five Minutes Song Duration of Writing (Maher Zain - The Chosen One)Assalamualaikum kids? How's life? Haha, today, i met with this lovely, beautiful kid and her parents are faithful Libyans. And of course, almost like emotional father, or maybe the sense of parenthood just started to kick in, or whatever the feeling im having at that time, I know i want to have it with you; and seeing how much I enjoy seeing the kid, I cant imagine how thrilled I am to see you guys, my beloved kids growing up.<br />
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maybe, you guys often wonder; "why the heck that this blogs is full of sum crap parenting advice?" or "what is he talking gibberish about? family? kids? damn it man! You're just 24 and u dont even have your own job yet, and you cant even take care of yourself and you want to have family" or perhaps "<i>apa benda la mamat ni, ingat senang ke nak ada keluarga, nak ada tanggungjawab</i>?"<br />
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As much as the answers are pretty much not on my side, and as much I want to have those capabilities, those traits of a father, I DON'T and that's fact. I just don't, at least for the near future, BUT that doesnt mean I am giving up; giving up my desires to have a family; giving up my desires to see you guys grow up, and become a better person in society, the desire to bear ALL these responsibility.<br />
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I believe, the most valuable essence, the basis, the strength to become a father, bearing such huge responsibility is to have the desire, to want to become one. I will continue to make effort, to get my message through, to have the burning passion and desire for my offspring, and I will continue doing so even when I am no longer breathing, even when I am only living in your heart and precious memories.<br />
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One of the key aspects in life is making decisions, that is derived by the desire to want to accomplish the things we think is the utmost valuable to us; and just remember that every options that we choose, has its consequences, and remember too for every fiery, burning desire that we decided to put off, will only make the surrounding darker, and before we're about to be swallowed, emblazoned in the pitch black, step up and make actions and the right decision to light it up again; who knows, the future that once may seem so dark is now brightly lid!<br />
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We never know the things that are gonna strike us, and things, happened, unexpectedly. However, we could make effort, and pray for the best. If God's willing, I will meet you one day kid, and let's hope I dont forget the feelings I had today. I will always, will always love you, like I always had :-)100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-75208236399440475752011-11-21T09:52:00.000-08:002011-11-21T13:56:06.122-08:00Five Minutes Song Duration of Writing (Maher Zain - Freedom)Assalamualaikum kids, how's life? For Freedom? I dont know what to say tho, there are so many things you can say about freedom, but there are just times when ironic speaks, and you dont really know about things or important matters that u once tot u know it so much, so briefly.<br />
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'Freedom' , is one those powerful words that walk side to side with 'integrity', 'passion' , 'faith' and other things any one could think of. The people of Malaysia, had been fighting so hard, and they had sacrificed so many things regardless of they realizing it or not, sacrifices in terms of direct or indirect, knowing or unknowingly they had offer things that they believe will contribute to the betterment of this country, to the things they believe in, to to things that they have 'faith' on, those things that keeps on their 'drive' and 'passion' burning; all these things they believe in only reflects deeply on how their true colors are, their inner-self, their 'integrity'.<br />
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Freedom had definitely plays an important role in our life, being free and being able to do the things that we wanted is what we thought we sought but let's face it, only by obeying God's rule can we become truly free. I am definitely not one of those people who have the ability to preach or teach others, but I would like to think that I am when I was once alive, I had created posts or write things that inspire people to change and find their true freedom.<br />
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Being muslim, our definition of freedom can be somewhat perplexing for the atheis, for people who of different creeds and beliefs; they often ask how can by preventing to do so many things, how can by putting up so many restrictions and had to obey lotsa rules in islam can one be considered free? That's one of the question I often ask, but dont worry, my faith is not shaken, but only to be very determined to show how freedom really is, at least from my perspective as muslim.<br />
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God had definitely have His way in guiding us, without we realizing it or not, but often we did not, and I too am one of those unfortunate ones. At times, I was never thankful for the things that I had, never realized what a precious gem I've been holding on, only to realize the worth of it once it's already gone. I believe, Islam put up such restrictions as guidelines; and us, the humble servant of God tends to screw up and make mistakes in life, thus Allah knows what is best for us.<br />
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I cant be more preachy than today, for sum reason, I just cant; for my knowledge is superbly inadequate, and the knowledge I accumulated until today cant even be compared to the tiny droplets of water in the ocean. Kids, grow up to be a better person in life, and remember, love your parents too, cause I love you guys, like I always had.100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-9510138941836459882011-11-20T17:45:00.000-08:002011-11-21T13:41:22.444-08:00Five Minutes Song Duration of Writing (Westlife - I Had a Dream)Assalamualaikum kids? How's life? Haha, from now on I wanna start to introduce sumthing random, yeah, im gonna try to write anything dat comes up to my fickle minded mind as I hear to random, favorite songs in my music playlist. So, anything dat comes up is pretty much random after all, based on the songs that I listened.<br />
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Okay, so here goes....I have a dream, of making the world a better place for us to live in, maybe I cant contribute much to society yet, and as much as I want to, there are just excuses and procrastination dat comes up, created regardless of my intention tho.<br />
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I know this may be naive, like "what the heck mate?" or "why? are the world we currently live in is not good enough for you?" those negative perspective definitely stir up, but still, it's of course is much easier to just succumb and dive into negative ideas, stay relax and do nothing at home, but I am not one of those people, I hope, i tried to remind myself, that I want to contribute, I want to make people happy, I enjoy a win-win situation and i hate seeing tears of pain and bloodshed especially in my home country, I hate the fact that people starts to segregate themselves into different political parties, opinions and thoughts make them so divided, they focus on their differences rather the things that they had in common, or just realize that each one is trying to survive just as well, just trying to live, and should we realize too that without them, we dont exist. we should acknowledge the fact that their existence complements our lives, our short, fragile life that is such a waste to spend it on being angry and pissed off all the time.<br />
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I love people, i love friends, I may not look like a friendly people, but I realized that too, apart from family, these strangers who I met along the way, along the route, <i>sepanjang perjuangan ini</i>, these people who fight shoulder to shoulder with me, these people who helped me in achieving to become a better person, a better man, a better muslim in life, these people, i endearingly hold onto, these people who I called friends, I cant convey how thankful I am, and only be able to express it, soliloquizing it to myself that after family and blood relationship, u guys are the most valuable thing I sought after. And as life goes on, people will change, they wont stay by yourside any longer, and good friends depart but good friends arrive as well, or so they said.<br />
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Time's up, I need to go now kids. Ciao! Assalamualaikum, and I will always love you guys like I always had :-)))100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-63604152994967129112011-10-20T17:51:00.000-07:002011-10-20T17:51:33.092-07:00Random Thoughts....Like Again<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Assalamualaikum kids? How's life? Today, we're gonna approach life, from maybe a slightly different perspective, another angle, so that we will always have this new, up and fresh ideas about things dat happen in our daily life. And today, I feel like giving sum sort of inspirational talk, as a boost to your self esteem, as well improving mine. Lets roll.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; color: #44483d; line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>Rasulullah SAW bersabda, “<strong style="color: #362f2d;">Sampaikanlah dari ku walaupun hanya satu ayat</strong>.” Hadis Riwayat Ahmad, Bukhari, Tarmidzi. dan sayang sekali, dalam keghairahan ayah menekan kekunci keyboard selama ini, jarang sekali ayah menyampaikan pesanan dan dakwahnya. Maka maafkan ayah; </i>Ill try better next time.</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #44483d; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><i>Kita semua mengejar cinta, mengejar pasangan hidup yang kita dambakan. Apabila kamu kembali ke tempat asal kamu, ayah nak kamu pergi berjumpa sesiapa, sesiapa sahaja, dan katakan yang kamu sukakan mereka, katakan kamu cintakan mereka, dan ingin menghabiskan masa kamu pada masa hadapan bersamanya, dan pastikan orang itu bukan ahli keluarga kita; orang asing semestinya, dan katakan di tengah khalayak ramai.</i></span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #44483d; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><i>Tidak masuk akal? Gila? Sememangnya! </i></span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #44483d; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><i>Tapi apa rasionalnya ayah menyuruh kamu berbuat demikian? Ketika kita terlalu asyik mengungkapkan kata cinta pada hambaNya, kita jarang sekali mengucapkan rasa cinta pada Penciptanya; dan ingat lah juga, ketika hambaNya sentiasa menolak cinta kita, Allah tidak pernah sekali menolak rasa kasih kita padaNya dan pintu taubat itu sentiasa terbuka.</i></span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #44483d; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;">I dont really have many other things to say currently except the fact that, I may had not become a good father thruout the years, and I cant help but saying sorry profusely<i>; dan mengatakan setiap yang buruk itu datangnya dari kelemahan ayah sendiri. </i></span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #44483d; line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Love you guys, will always, like I always had :-) </span></span><br />
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</span></span>100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2569994813935200157.post-44475748261129947742011-10-18T16:53:00.000-07:002011-10-18T16:55:14.362-07:00Another Chance I Guess<i>Ada orang pernah bertanya pada ayah, kenapa kita sentiasa menagih cinta apabila kita sedar bahawa cinta itu membutakan? dan dalam keghairahan kita mengejar cinta, kita terlalu taksub dengannya sehingga kita mengalpakan cinta dariNya. Apabila cinta hambaNya tidak lagi dapat kita tagihi, kita lantas menadah tangan meminta kepadaNya agar kembali ke dalam terjerumus dalam keadaan yang pada dasarnya kita fikir tidak berdosa malahan ramai yang mengelarnya sebagai cinta sejati, tetapi sebenarnya hanyalah suatu fasa sementara dan alasan untuk kita bergelumang dengan nafsu; dan lebih pelik lagi, walaupun kita sedar dengan setiap keburukan dan kekurangan yang akan kita hadapi, KENAPA kita masih memilih cinta itu? Ketepikan buat sementara kisah orang lain, ini cerita kita, cerita ayah pada anak-anaknya dengan tujuan memberi iktibar, dan memikirkan kembali pengalaman lalu, betapa sesatnya ayah ketika itu, betapa patutnya terjadi perkara yang terjadi itu terjadi peristiwa yang sangat memalukan; setiap kejadian itu ada hikmahnya, dan ini adalah peringatan pada diri ayah sendiri, supaya jangan terlalu ghairah mengejar cinta yang tidak pasti, sehingga mengorbankan prinsip dan peribadi seorang muslim. Ayah cuba tak buat lagi. Ayah sentiasa sayangkan kamu </i>, like I always had.100:1-100:11http://www.blogger.com/profile/13445197828508732471noreply@blogger.com0